You know the drill by now: I dig (a little) to find some pretty decent horror flicks you either never heard of or never thought worth your time (and YOU’RE WRONG!). Don’t argue, don’t doubt…just go find ’em and watch ’em. You’re welcome.
The Hoard (2009) – This little French zombie ditty (yes, it’s subtitled, get over it) is a really well done tale of the undead apocalypse from the eyes a small group. Yeah, nothing original there. But this group happens to be made up of two warring criminal families who happened to be in the middle of a bloody fucking shoot-out in a run down housing complex when the dead suddenly start to rise. That’ll give ya’ perspective. Surprisingly great acting and dialogue, gory as fuck, and an interesting study on loyalty and vengeance in the worst of circumstances. And don’t worry, the french chick shaves her pits so it’s cool…
Scarier than zombies? Or just less hygenic?
Stake Land (2010) – Another tale of apocalypse survival (vampires this time) that actual takes it’s time to develop the characters it kills and gives you plenty of time to suck in the rotting, depressing environment in which it’s staged. The frigid landscape is as much a character as the actors. No one is safe and it really surprises with some gutsy (no pun) character kill-offs. And any movie that has vampires being dropped from helicopters as undead viral bombs is worth the viewing. Nothing happy here. You can probably find it on cable once in a while…it was in like five theaters for five minutes and made zilch.
Chernobyl Diaries (2012) – You probably remember the trailers for this on TV a little while back…but you didn’t go see it. It only hauled in like 37 million, which actually is great considering its budget of 1 million, so technically it didn’t bomb. But do you know anyone who saw it? Nothing ground breaking here, but still a solid, taut, suspense thriller shot on location, again, using the sparse and depressing landscape and architecture as a character. Expect misery, pain, no happy endings, and lots of disfigured fucking mutants. And a big russian bear (sadly, it does not ride a unicycle).
Which is unfortunate, because what’s more terrifying than this? I just shit myself.
Black Death (2010) – The Brits do the Dark Ages justice. A tiny band of knights are charged to find out why some remote village has yet to be struck by the black plague. Lucky? Immunity? A cure? Witchcraft? This movie is less about answers and climactic resolutions, but rather about the fear and weakness of man, and the tragedy of vengeance. And there’s a fuck-ton of gory violence. Four-way horse pull, anyone? Who wants the torso?
The Tall Man (2012) – A box office dark hole but mostly because it was marketed terribly. While it appears to be a horror movie (a slasher), it’s not…or rather it’s not the horror you expect. It starts out as a decent, mysterious boogie man movie…then flips 180º and turns into a very dark social commentary.
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